Night Shift

You shout, you rant

You turn things around

But you’re the fool

The conversation ended when you said hello

The night is young

I won’t let you affect me

Screaming won’t help you

Dissing me won’t do you any good

 

You have problems, I have mine

Don’t let my patience step out of the line

10/07/11

let’s take a walk on the other side

we’ve crossed this line too many times

why are you doubting the signs?

this time let’s make something new

this time it wont end too soon

-

hold my hand dear

trust me i wont let go

-

your past still haunts you

bringing you down

i’ll save you from these miseries

we will make our own stories

Cycle

your songs speak to me like flooding emotions

blocking all my way out

i’m consumed by your passion

 

drowning in your world of silence

wishing someone could hear you

but you can never speak

 

you take it all out in huge waves of oblivion

sorrow, death and anger are your illusions

 

you try to speak your emotions

one by one you gather them all

forming into this thick mass of resolution

you add your music into it

giving it life and freedom

 

for all to hear

for everyone to listen

for you to get noticed again

by the one who left for you for another

 

you’re mute

speechless

your songs speak for you

ending this cycle

returning to the beginning

 

and now we’re back to square one

your songs drown me with your passion

suicide

lucky are the departed

i envy them

this life i have is of no use to me

i have nothing to offer

i have nothing to give

i live because God wants me to live

yet the purpose is still unknown to me

i lie awake every night wishing for death

for years i’ve yearned for it

i still do

i still ask why

why am i here?

why i’m still alive

i am of no use

and nobody seems to want to make use of me

all of them are controlling

wanting my life to be like what they want theirs to be

but that’s bullshit

you can force me to be like you

to be someone i’m not

you can force yourself to me

and i will never render myself to you

you say you care

but you never did

you’re just a control freak

you don’t want any scandals

and you never wanted me

you hate me

and i loathe you

don’t worry

i never wanted to be here in the first place

i don’t like me

i don’t want me

kill, kill, kill!

my end is so unclear

today, tomorrow, later

i do not know when will i break

i wish i had the courage

the strength to leave

to die with my own hands

a gift. a blessing

freedom

the soldier (coming home)

you never sing me songs anymore

like you said you would

never come to visit

like in the days of old

-

the autumn leaves have fallen

and summer breeze has passed

still no sign from you yet

the year has gone unmasked

-

colorful flowers have faded

and the day lit sky has turned to night

another day, another night

another harvest, another plight

-

years have passed, and still no sign

i no longer wait for you

i have moved on from the past

i now walk on the other side

-

a few have come and go

they were so unlike you

but still the longing and waiting is there

i try to hide it, i frown and stare

-

i do not count the years anymore

im old and wretched

standing, i cant do no more

the years have passed so soon

-

i lie here waiting for it to come

to finally take me out of this light

and into the darkest sight

but it says something is yet to come

-

the dawn shines upon me

my eyes are tired, i no longer want to see

i lie here lifeless, waiting for my last breath

then the thing i wanted the most came by, and we met

-

he was with him, the one i so longed for

reaching for my fingertips, i can no longer hold

the lights are slowly fading away

and yet i still see him like that of the 1st day

-

the first few lingering moments of flirting and fun

together with the sun, grass and sand

running around, laughing and screaming

chasing butterflies and watching stars light

-

the memories came, rushing right back

he still has the same soft touch

i look him in the eye and now i understand

i let go of this world

-

push forward to the next

finally together